“That is sufficient to dispose of the immediate fact-finding allegation. The question is, where is (father’s) wider submission left? My findings clearly dispose of the mother’s application to suspend contact in the case but they do not dispose, and I cannot dispose, of the father’s application that L should, in future, live with him and not the mother. As advanced during his evidence, he presented it in some ways as a last resort. He feared that we had reached the position where in future the mother would be unable either to permit him a normal relationship with L or to promote his relationship with L in any way. On the evidence I have heard, I am left with grave concerns in that respect but it would be wrong to reach any final conclusion on this evidence.”
“Perhaps also inevitably, after a judgment of this kind, the question is, how will the mother and, in this case, the maternal grandmother, react to it? Is it possible from this point to move into what I shall describe as “a more broad and sunlit upland” in which L’s time with his father in England and, more especially, in Northern Ireland passes peacefully and in L’s best interests without any further allegations of this kind being made; or will the immediate future of this case see more of the same – more of the dreadful past history of litigation which we have had now for far too many years?”
“…I have confirmed in this report that L is safe in the care of (father). (Mother and grandmother) must accept this. They must also accept that they have created a situation where L returns to their care and shares aspects of his spending time that are not necessarily true and they facilitate a manipulation of or put words into L’s mouth. However, if (mother) cannot accept this at the next hearing then I would be inclined to consider more greatly that a change of residence is necessary.”
“Significant concerns that L is caught up in a very acrimonious dispute between his parents and that inevitably he must be picking up on this. He must be absolutely torn apart that his loyalties are pulled one way and then the other by the very people who should be ensuring that he has a secure, loving and stable environment. I have no doubt that the emotional pressure on L can be nothing short of enormous and only by his parents achieving a full, lasting resolution can this little boy hope to enjoy a normal, happy childhood.”
“L described his mother entirely positively and his father entirely negatively. L’s responses to his father during supervised contact appear to show little concern for his feelings and he required no prompting to say that he wanted no contact with his father.”
“Ms Beer’s report draws a striking contrast between L’s comments about his father when in the presence of the his mother – these are entirely negative – and the reality of L’s relationship with his father. The contrast is between a child who is prepared openly and apparently without prompting to blame his father for abusing him; and this description: “I observed L and his father to have a highly positive, close and fun relationship with one another. It was entirely obvious once L was able to relax and have fun that he feels comfortable in the presence of his father and he presented as a very happy, excited and joyous child. I found there to be no concerns with the quality of their relationship or with the care and attention the father provided L.” “I observed L and his father to have a highly positive, close and fun relationship with one another. It was entirely obvious once L was able to relax and have fun that he feels comfortable in the presence of his father and he presented as a very happy, excited and joyous child. I found there to be no concerns with the quality of their relationship or with the care and attention the father provided L.”
“…(the father) had openly taken a video of (maternal grandmother) on an occasion when the father was due to collect L from the grandmother outside the school gates. It is true that the grandmother can be seen behaving entirely inappropriately and in a hostile manner towards the father during the course of this video. When the grandmother gave evidence before me she accepted that on this occasion she had behaved inappropriately. She also told me that she was someone who was hot-tempered. She also expressed the view that in her opinion she was dealing with an irresponsible father.”
“I am firstly concerned about the actions of the grandmother. She described herself as a hot-tempered woman when giving evidence before me on the last occasion. The video of her actions on one handover confirm her description. She believed the father to be irresponsible. She will have left L in no doubt about these views. I find she will have described him as a “bad man” on many occasions in the past, as the father contends. The grandmother presents very differently from mother. When giving evidence, the impression is that the mother is a relatively passive individual. The grandmother is not. There may well be a dynamic in play in the family home where to this point the grandmother has set the tone. L spends substantial amounts of time in the grandmother’s care. I find that the grandmother’s approach heavily influences L’s present words and actions when in his mother’s home.”
“The reality is, however, that it is the mother and grandmother who have created this situation. The father has not done so. He has, largely, not been in a position to influence L against his mother and there is no evidence that he has done so. He has not behaved ideally on occasions. The feel of the case is that the father fights his ground hard and does not give it up easily.”
“The whole incident demonstrates how easy it is for parents at war to damage a child. In context I can understand, but not condone, the father’s actions. He believes he has to fight his corner hard. There is a considerable body of evidence to suggest that he is correct in this. The mother takes advantage of any chink in the father’s armour or opportunity to be difficult (this is the feel for example of the “handover video” referred to in my previous judgment). I find that she knew L would be travelling abroad on holiday but took the opportunity not to handover the passport when she believed it would be required. This incident happened after my findings of fact and when the mother could have been under no illusion that I was looking for a more positive response from her. The actions of the mother and grandmother have a slightly harder “edge” to them because they are both health professionals and should know better.”
“It is in that light that I must view the evidence given by the mother and the grandmother. I am afraid that I do not accept that the grandmother has performed what in the light of her evidence to me at the fact-finding hearing would be a U-turn. She remains a woman with a short temper who has a very poor view of the father. She will have called him a “bad man” (in Cantonese) in L’s presence on many occasions as the father alleges. Her attitude will, in my judgment, continue to be evident to L. He will continue to spend much time in the care of the grandmother. It is more difficult to guage the mother’s approach in future. She was reflective when giving evidence. On the other hand she seems a passive individual. I do not believe she really wants to change L’s view of his father. Moreover, I do not think she will have the strength of character to do so. If I look to the future, I am afraid I see more of the past. I add that it would now I believe take a real effort to change L’s approach to his father when in the care of the mother and grandmother. I do not believe they are up to this. Importantly, it is not just a question of L’s attitude to his father. At present, I do not believe that L is wedded to the idea that he is an abused child: I have accepted the father’s evidence that L told him he had been put up to say things to the police. There is, however, a danger that L’s repetition of allegations to his maternal family might become a belief system. In this case, I would not put the danger at the extreme end of the scale, but it exists.”
“The remedy of transferring residence from one parent to the non-resident parent is an essential weapon or tool in these cases as a weapon or tool of resort. It may indeed be a case of putting a gun to a parent’s head to force her or him to rethink, as counsel described it, but that, it seems to me, is a legitimate approach and remedy. However, whereas here there has been an apparent volte-face by the mother and a concession that now contact should happen, combined with an acceptance by all that the mother’s care was in all other respects adequate, the remedy of last resort needs to be deployed with great care and any apparent change of heart, seems to me, fully tested.”
“The transfer of residence from the obdurate primary carer to the parent frustrated in pursuit of contact is a judicial weapon of last resort. There was hardly a need for a psychologist to establish the risks of moving these girls from mother to father, not only after her long years of care but also in the light of the negative picture that they had been given of a father who they had not effectively seen for 17 months. The risks of gamesmanship from the mother in the future, confirmed in residence but nailed down with a clear detailed contact order, were plainly less, and from that essential risk balance the judge was diverted. In a sense it could be said that the order she made was premature and in its draconian content too risky for these children.”
“[183] C has spent all his 7 years under his mother’s care, with whom he has a strong and beneficial bond. No court would alter that situation without clear evidence that he had suffered harm which would continue or was at serious risk of that. In April he was suffering harm because of the mother’s attitude to his relationship with his father. Re-reading Dr B’s first report shows how the tension and the attitudes were affecting C. [184] It was not done to cause him harm. It was part of the mother’s negative feelings towards the father being allowed a far too free a rein. It was to C’s detriment. It is, sadly, a not uncommon result of a breakdown in a relationship. It is not often that it is so graphically pointed out as in this case. Courts are slow to change residence in such circumstances without giving the resident parent a chance to understand what has gone wrong and to remedy it, provided that such a course is compatible with a child’s best interest. The changes in the mother’s attitude justify such a course in C’s best interests. [185] I consider the mother has shown an understanding of what has gone wrong. She has apparently listened and responded. I am less clear about whether she has the will to sustain the implementation of the changes needed. There has been too little time, though progress has been made. It is therefore best if the court retains a close supervision of the progress.”
“7.6 It is the duty of a Children’s Guardian fairly and competently to conduct proceedings on behalf of the child. The Children’s Guardian must have no interest in the proceedings adverse to that of the child and all steps and decisions the Children’s Guardian takes in the proceedings must be taken for the benefit of the child. 7.7 The Children’s Guardian who is an officer of the service or a Welsh Family Proceedings Officer has, in addition, the duties set out in Part 3 of this Practice Direction and must exercise those duties as set out in that Part.”
“Where do you want to live?”