FM v SB [2026] EWFC 147 (B)
DISTRICT JUDGE PARKER:
[1]I am concerned with four children, J, who is aged 11. A, who is 10, R, who is 7, and I who is 8.[2]The parties separated on 15 June 2021, their mum fled the home with the children and was placed in a safe place by the Local Authority. At the time, and which is still the case, her whereabouts are not known. The father has not seen the children since that date.[3]He has subsequently applied for a child arrangements (spend time with) order including a prohibited steps order in relation to the non-removal of the children from the UK.[4]This case has a prolonged history with a number of successive directions with regard to locating the mother and her subsequent non-engagement between 2021 and 2023. Ultimately a section 37 report was directed on 21 September 2023.[5]On 20 December 2023 the mother attended court and agreed to comply with the previous directions and to file a schedule of allegations in relation to domestic abuse. That order was not complied with despite personal service and following subsequent non-attendances, contempt proceedings were instigated of the court’s own initiative and a warrant of committal subsequently issued.[6]The Mother was arrested on 12 September 2023 and brought before the Court. It was on that occasion that the mother instructed solicitors and the warrant was suspended.[7]On 3 October 2025 substantive directions were given with regards to allegations as to domestic abuse and in the interim, mum was to send one up-to-date photo of the children to the father. A cognitive functioning report was also ordered in relation to the mother.[8]By order of 23 January 2026, the warrant of committal was discharged. The matter was listed for a pretrial review and thereafter a finding-of-fact hearing. I also made directions with regards to the scope of the findings and participation directions as the cognitive functioning report with regards to the mother makes various recommendations due to her low cognitive ability.[9]The pretrial review was held before me on 7 April 2026 and I made various directions pertaining to the composite schedule.[10]It is worth noting on the order that, in light of the additional evidence, the court would not be constrained or limited to the findings as set out in the schedule itself and that the Court could make additional specific or global findings based on the evidence, which included both the police evidence and evidence from the school. I also invited the father to reflect on the evidence that was before the Court particularly that from the children’s school.[11]The findings sought by the mother are as follows:(1) In 2014 the father hit her when she was pregnant and threatened her.(2) In 2014 the father threatened her with a knife to cut her up and tried to cut her and also hit her on the head and body. She again was pregnant at the time and the police were contacted.(3) In 2017 the father hit her with his hands and punched her head and shoulders when she was in hospital. She had just given birth to I.(4) In 2017 to 2018, again he hit her with his hands and with a wooden stick.(5) In 2018 he hit her with a wooden stick on the hand and on her back when pregnant. She phoned the police, but they did not attend.(6) In 2019, he threatened to cut her up with a razor and to eat her up. On another occasion he was about to cut her private parts during bath time when he began to shave her body.(7) He repeatedly hit her when he came home from work and also hit her if she ordered food.(8) She had to stop him from hitting J with a metal stick on the head.(9) In 2020 he hit her on the back and swore at her and threatened to cut her head off and took a spade and tried to cut her neck but it slipped and hit her face causing bleeding.(10) He would hit her and ask for her purse. He would also force her to withdraw cash from a cash machine and he would constantly question her spending and check her invoices and receipts. There were further aspects of financial abuse which were removed from the schedule namely that she was forced to take out a loan and hit, and also hit when she refused to take out a joint account.(11) In June 2021, the father threatened J and screamed at her causing her to be put in fear. He also picked her up by the collar and held her up in the air and scratched her neck and face with his fingernails when she slipped when the mother took the child away from him. The Police were called and the father left. The children then informed the school who ultimately called Social Services.THE PLEADINGS
[12]In relation to the paper evidence before the Court, I have read a report from Black Country Women’s Aid. They received a referral on 17 June 2021 with regards to domestic abuse from the Local Authority following the children’s disclosures and they were admitted to the refuge. It was recorded that the father hits the children and beats the mother when they make a noise. She also reports that the father throws toys at her and the children when angry.[13]I note that there was a Local Authority contact record on 11 December 2020. Within it, A disclosed that ‘Daddy hit J and mum’, mum denied it at the time. It is reported that J had a scratch on her face and said that dad had hit her and hit mum on the nose, however, they were unable to substantiate the allegations of physical chastisement. It recorded that the parents at the time acknowledged historic domestic abuse. The police took no further action and the case was closed.[14]There was a child and family assessment on 18 June 2021. It records that the school believed that the mother was scared of the father due to her presentation. The children disclosed that the dad hit the mother a lot and they moved into a place of safety at the refuge. It is recorded that mum is now starting to show insight with regards to domestic abuse and its impact. The mum is recorded as being very anxious. It is recorded that the professionals believe that this is an abusive marriage and the children are telling the truth in relation to long term domestic abuse. There was also an ongoing investigation from the police and therefore, no further role was identified for the Local Authority.[15]The section 37 report, which I referred to earlier, records that J is scared of her father. She recalls domestic abuse and witnessing it and also being hit herself. A says she does not want to see her dad, she is scared of him. I also does not want to see his dad and R does not want to see her father either. The father however, denies the allegations of domestic abuse. It is recorded that mum initially told professionals that the father had passed away; however this, she said, was out of fear. It is finally recorded that there needed to be substantial parenting work with the father before contact could recommence.[16]Father’s response to the allegations is a blanket denial. He believes the allegations are fabricated to stop him seeing the children. There is no corroborative evidence of alleged significant assaults and the allegations themselves are made many years post the incidents, none of which have been pursued by the police. He denies physically harming the children and believes they have been manipulated and the mother’s initial failure to engage in proceedings was a deliberate ploy to frustrate his contact.[17]I have read the disclosure from the children’s school.[18]Firstly on 3 March 2020 there was disclosure that the father hit A and she went to hospital and the father was arrested.[19]On 15 June 2020 there is disclosure from J that mum was bleeding. She was hurt on the mouth and that dad had hit her and mum was crying.[20]On 1 December 2020 there is disclosure from A that dad had hit the mum and she was bleeding and he pushed and hit J. It was noted on that occasion that when mum was asked about it, she denied domestic abuse.[21]On 4 December 2020 there is disclosure from J saying that dad hit her and she got a scratch.[22]On 15 December 2020 A also discloses that dad pushed J and had a scratch on her face. This was confirmed by the teacher.[23]On 25 February 2021, the school had concerns with regards to domestic abuse and father’s control over the mother, similarly this was also shared by the family support worker.[24]On 29 April 2021, there was an EHA meeting following a referral in relation to the children’s disclosures where it was noted that mum appears suppressed and frightened and dad was dominating the conversation.[25]On 19 May 2021, there was disclosure from J that mum was crying and dad pulled her hair.[26]On 7 June 2021, A disclosed that dad keeps pushing mum, causing her to cry. This was an unprompted disclosure and s referral made.[27]On 11 June 2021, J disclosed that dad had hit the mother and made her cry.[28]On 17 June 2021, mum agreed to go into a refuge and it appears from the notes that mum presented as frightened and traumatised and that father should not be beating her, which has been confirmed by the children in that he had made her nose bleed. In the Three Houses work, it was reported J says that dad hits her and hits mum and hit her with a shoe. A also reports that dad pushed mum causing a cut to her arm.[29]I have also read the police disclosure.[30]It refers to an incident on 21 April 2014, whereupon the father is reported to have punched and slapped the mother whilst in bed, which continued the following morning, with him hitting her back, face, throat and shoulder causing reddening to the face. He was arrested. It was reported that this was witnessed by the maternal grandmother. It was also recorded that the police noted slight reddening of her cheek. In support of that there is a witness statement from the mother where she reports being slapped hard to the back when in bed and punched on the back of the head and on her face on the cheek. The assault was repeated in the morning namely a punch to the head, cheek and throat. The mother told him to stop. She reports that this was the first time this had happened. There is a similar witness statement from the aunt where she reports that she heard her sister’s husband using insulting words towards her sister and on two occasions had hit her. She witnessed the incident on 21 April 2014 when the husband was throwing punches and kicks towards her sister’s face. She tried to break it up and in the process he swore at her and grabbed her scarf. The mother then intervened.[31]There is a further report of 11 December 2020 where A disclosed to the school that her father hit J and mum and pushed the baby. He hit her face causing a scratch and hit mum on the nose, it was recorded that mum appeared nervous. She said the father hit her only once in 2014, it was only a tap, but he has not hit her since and she denied domestic abuse. At that stage she did not wish to pursue matters.[32]There is also a record on 9 June 2021 which refers to a referral from the school with concerns with regards to domestic abuse on 7 June 2021. It is recorded that the mother and the children are all stating that they are hit by the father when he is angry. R has a scratch to the face caused by father and was spoken to at school who also observed the scratch. The children are hit if they make a noise and she fears being hit when he is angry. It is recorded that the Father would not let mum speak to the social worker alone. When spoken to, mum subsequently stated that she was really scared.[33]In her witness statement prepared by the police, she says that when the father is angry he throws things at her. No contact is made as she dodges them. She states that she is not physically hit or verbally abused. He does not control her but she also says the father was warned in 2020 not to shake the children by the daycare centre. He was given a warning. She said he would shake and slap the children and caused J a mark on her face. She said he only shouted and slapped them, not pushed or hit.[34]In essence the mother firstly asserts that the father perpetrated physical abuse against her predominantly in the form of hitting her with his hand and objects. Secondly, that he perpetrated physical abuse and threats of violence against the children. Thirdly, the father acted in a threatening and intimidating manner towards her. Fourthly, he acted in a controlling manner including, but not limited, to monitoring her spending. THE ORAL EVIDENCE THE MOTHER EVIDENCE IN CHIEF[35]She gave details as to incident number two. She was asked why there was an argument that day. She said that she asked for support as she was pregnant. The father was unhappy that she was pregnant. She was staying with her parents at the time and he got a knife, called a Daa, from the kitchen and threatened her with it. She said the incident took place in the living room. She said she then went to the police station.[36]In relation to Incident three, she says that whilst at hospital, a nurse came into her cubicle and asked if everything was okay. The father was with her at the time and when she left the father pinched her.[37]In relation to Incident four, she said the wooden stick was an ordinary stick which the father obtained from outside.[38]With regard to incident six, she says the father cleaned her private parts including shaving her. She said that this was in fact her job and was part of Islamic tradition post her period. It was not the father’s role to do this unless she was unable to do it herself.QUESTIONS FROM FATHER’S COUNSEL
[39]In relation to allegation two, she reiterated that the father was not happy that she was pregnant. The fact that the knife came out was a complete shock to her. Thereafter the relationship with the father deteriorated and he became suspicious of her having an affair with another man. She is not sure whether the father was pleased with any of her pregnancies. None of them were planned. She says during the marriage they never used to communicate. He also provided no support. It was not a good marriage and there were no happy times and the marriage ultimately broke down following the incident in June 2021 involving J.[40]She also gave details of an altercation that took place at a family meeting in 2015 between her brother and the father over the father’s passport.[41]In relation to allegation 11, it was put to her that the father denies hurting J or indeed assaulting any of the children. The mother maintains that she has been subjected to domestic abuse since 2014 until 2021. Now that she is separated from father, she feels as lot safer.RE-EXAMINATION
[42]She said that during the altercation in 2015 with regard to the family, that the father started this. She tried to break it up and in the process the father hit her.[43]I asked her about disclosures with regard to the school in December 2020 when she initially denied domestic abuse. She said this was due to fear and repercussions and similarly with regard to her denials in 2021 as they were still living together at the time. FATHERS EVIDENCE EVIDENCE IN CHIEFFATHERS EVIDENCE
[44]The Father continued to deny any abuse towards the mother and the children.QUESTIONS FROM MOTHER’S COUNSEL
[45]It was put to the father that they were living in cramped conditions with four children, on a low income and with no support network. The father indicated there was no debt and they did in fact visit the maternal grandmother up until 2015. He denied it was a stressful environment. He denied the children being noisy and that this bothered him. He was challenged with regard to this on a social work visit on 22 December 2020 that records that if the children made a noise they were told not to. He responded this was only because of the neighbours as they live in a flat and they would complain. He denied disciplining them and denied getting angry with the children at all.[46]In relation to allegation 11, he denied scratching J. A he says caused this. It was put to him that J disclosed this at school. He said this was not true. It was put to him that this disclosure was an unprompted disclosure, repeated on a number of occasions to various professionals and corroborated by A subsequently, again unprompted. He maintained that this was not true, it was a lie. He had no idea why they would say this other than what he said in his statement where he alleged the children were being manipulated by the mother. It was put to him that when the mother was spoken to about this incident she denied any assault, so why would she manipulate the children to say otherwise.[47]It was put to him that in the section 37 report he had previously asserted that J injured herself by falling down the stairs at the home of the maternal family. However, at that point in time the mother was estranged from him, which it appears he had accepted previously when asked about this by the social worker and he was challenged that these accounts were contradictory.[48]He was taken to the Three Houses work. J said dad hit her and mum and A said that dad pushed mum and pushed her and she fell to the floor. A described dad being angry and pushed her and hit mum. J says that dad hit her and her face was scratched. I also made disclosures of at the child visit on 22 December 2020. These disclosures support each other. He blankly denied this and said they were all lies.[49]With regard to allegation nine, it was put to him that the mother also reports being hit by objects causing injury which makes her bleed which was corroborated by both J and A. He denied that this was true. It was put to him there is no reason for children to deny.[50]He disputed that he had married the mother for immigration purposes.[51]With regard to allegation two, the police report, records that he punched and slapped the mother causing reddening to her face. It was put to him that the police also noticed this. He denied the incident ever happening. He denied he was ever possessive of the mother and her whereabouts. It was put to him that he was dependent on her as his visa at that time was as a dependent and if she was seeing someone else, that would put his visa application in jeopardy. He accepted that.[52]He denied removing the mother’s mobile from her but again he was challenged as to why the only number the Social Services had was that of his.[53]Continuing with allegation two, he denied the alleged incident took place at the maternal home. He said they had moved into rented accommodation and denied the incident in any event. He did not have access to a Daa.[54]He denied that he believed the mother was being unfaithful to him. He denied that he was ever angry or became violent. He denied that the mother left to stay with her sister despite her sister corroborating this to the police, as well as her niece, and that he had assaulted her sister. It was put to him that the reason that the maternal family stopped being involved or being seen was to prevent them from becoming involved. It was also put to him that the mother had also missed a number of antenatal appointments and the only time she did attend was when the father was present with her. It was put to him that this was evidence of controlling behaviour.[55]The incident with regard to the family dispute in 2015 was revisited. It was put to him that the reason why the family refused to give him his passport was due to their concerns about him taking the mother to Bangladesh. It was put to him that the mother had an interpreter at the family meeting. The only reason was because the father did not like her speaking English which he could not understand whereas she could.[56]Again, it was put to him that R was born at home despite the mother being in pain. The father responded that they did phone the hospital but the baby came soon. It was put to him that the reason he did not go to the hospital is because he feared the mother would make disclosures. He denied that.[57]He denied that there was domestic abuse in their relationship.[58]It was put to him that J also disclosed that her father hits her mother with a shoe. The Father says that this is a lie and he has no idea why she would lie. It was put to him that she further reports that he hit the mother and made her bleed, and the account as to this is mirrored with that of the mother’s own account.[59]With regard to allegation six, he accepts the Islamic custom of women cleaning themselves after their period which husbands should help with if they are unable to do it themselves. It was put to the father that in evidence he had repeatedly referred to the mother as being abnormal due to her learning disability. He accepted he did help her to clean herself. It was put to him that this would place the mother in an incredibly vulnerable position. He denied ever threatening her and indeed all the allegations of verbal and physical abuse as well as his suspicions of infidelity including the use of a wooden stick.[60]He was challenged about what he said in his evidence with regards to the family not being in debt. He was taken to the evidence that suggests that there was a support plan put in place to assist with their debts, as well as reference to obtaining a food hamper and the receipt of an eviction notice. He denied all knowledge of this. It was put to him that he would become angry when mum spent money on takeouts because of their financial position, and then thereafter he would resort to violence. He denied that. He also denied that he was the one who controlled the finances or that he would insist that the mother provide receipts as to her expenditure.[61]He was taken to the home visit of 11 December 2020. The social worker described mum looking frightened. The police also report that the father was reluctant for the mother to talk to them on her own. The social worker describes the father talking in the background on the phone and feeding the mum information. At a further school meeting, the father did all the talking and on 9 June 2021 would not allow the social worker to speak to the mother. It was only when she was alone was she able to start making disclosures and at that point she was so scared that she was shaking. This was not accepted.[62]I referred to a separate contact record myself on 11 December 2020 in relation to the parents both acknowledging historic domestic abuse. Father denied that. I also asked him about him being warned in 2020 by the daycare centre, not to shake the children. He also denied that.THE LAW
[63]The standard of proof to be applied to all finding-of-fact hearings is the balance of probabilities with the burden of proof lying on the party making the allegations. Neither the seriousness of the allegations nor the seriousness of the consequences makes a difference. The inherent probabilities are simply something to take into account in deciding where the truth lies.[64]Any findings must be established on the evidence availed to the Court including inferences that may be properly drawn from that evidence and not on suspicion or speculation. The Court must take account of all the evidence taken as a whole. Evidence cannot be evaluated and assessed in separate compartments. It is necessary to have regard to the relevance of each piece of evidence in relation to other pieces of evidence and to exercise an overview of the totality of the evidence in order to determine whether the appropriate standard of proof has been met.[65]The evidence of the parents/ parties is of the utmost importance. It is common for witnesses to sometimes tell lies in the course of a fact-finding hearing. However, the Court must be astute to the fact that a witness may lie for many reasons concerning the future upbringing of a child. The fact that the witness has lied about some matters, does not mean that they have lied about everything.[66]On the occasion of a fact-finding hearing, a judge does not necessarily have to deal with each and every inconsistency or conflict of evidence specifically, or give lengthy reasons for their conclusions as sometimes it can be difficult to articulate exactly why one witness is preferred to another. A judge simply has to do their best to put into words the impression which they have been left with at the end of the hearing. Discrepancies in evidence is, after all, to be expected and are part and parcel of litigation.[67]The Court is also not bound by the cases put forward by the parties, but may adopt an alternative solution of its own. Judges are entitled, where the evidence justifies it, to make findings of fact that have not been sought by the parties, but they should be cautious when doing so.MY ASSESSMENT OF THE WITNESSES
[68]Despite mother’s difficulties, I find her an honest witness who was able to provide a consistent account of her evidence. I am afraid that this was in sharp contrast to the father, who I find provided a blanket denial of all allegations and factual discrepancies levelled at him, despite a wealth of evidence contradicting him. In my view, the father seems incapable of providing a coherent response or in telling the truth.[69]The following are just some examples of the overwhelming evidence in this case against him which he has failed to address:a. The repeated unprompted disclosures of the children to a number of professionals including the Three Houses work which I find were free from any adult coaching and indeed, several of the injuries purported to have been incurred at the hands of the father, were reported to be seen by third party professionals.b. The inconsistent evidence as to how he says J came by the scratch to her face.c. The police noting the reddening of the mother’s cheek.d. His blatant lie that they were not struggling as a family financially when there is clear evidence to the contrary.e. The fearful demeanour of the mother as picked up by a number of professionals.f. The contact record of 11 December 2020 when, despite it being recorded both parents acknowledged historic domestic abuse, the father now completely denies.[70]Mother’s counsel in submissions has invited me to make general findings on the basis of all the evidence over and above the specific findings sought that:a. There was domestic abuse, verbal, emotional and physical including mum being hit both with the father’s hands and objects causing injury.b. Controlling behaviour throughout the relationship including, but not limited to, financial matters.c. Father perpetrating physical abuse against the children on a number of occasions and;d. That the proceedings themselves having been conducted in a manner to further that abuse despite the weight of evidence against the father. Indeed I remind myself of the prehearing review when I asked the father to reflect on matters given the evidence from the school and in particular the disclosures of the children.[71]Through his counsel, the father made submissions of a continued blanket denial by putting mother to proof. There were no concessions.MY FINDINGS
[72]This mother is an extremely vulnerable lady who I find the father took advantage of and treated her appallingly over a prolonged period from 2014 to 2021, both affecting her and the children until ultimately she was able to break free of him.[73]I find all the specific findings 1 to 11 proven in their entirety.[74]On the finding of financial abuse, although the allegation as to her being forced to take out a loan and also hit when she refused to take out a joint account, does not form part of the specific findings, I nevertheless make a general finding that there was throughout the relationship coercive and controlling behaviour, both financially and emotionally in almost every aspect of the mother’s life. The impact of this on a vulnerable lady would have been significant. We often talk about survivors of domestic abuse. This lady truly is a survivor and has managed to escape an appalling relationship with her four children. That is no mean feat and she deserves admiration for the courage that she has displayed.[75]Over and above these specific findings sought, the evidence from the children’s school paints a broader picture of the abuse this mother and the children have suffered at the hands of the father. Therefore, it is well within my discretion, having regard to the whole canvass of the evidence, to make more general findings which I do. Namely:(1) From 2014 to 2021 the father perpetrated domestic abuse both verbal, emotional and physical, including use of implements towards the mother causing injury to her.(2) That the father perpetrated both physical and emotional abuse towards the children including, at times, inflicting injury to them.[76]At the prehearing review, I invited the father to reflect on the evidence from the school in relation to the disclosures from the children, sadly he has not. His response to the allegations is one of complete denial, putting the mother to proof. He offers no concessions at all and in my view is completely lacking in empathy and insight.[77]To that extent, the continuous of these proceedings, at least from the date of the prehearing review until now, in my view has furthered the abuse, despite the weight of evidence.[78]As a final note, it may be that this judgment and the order sought should be submitted to the Home Office in relation to any consideration currently being given to the father’s immigration status.[79]That is my judgment and the reasons for it. End of Judgment. Transcript of a recording by Acolad UK Ltd 291-299 Borough High Street, London SE1 1JG Tel: 020 7269 0370 legal@ubiqus.com Acolad UK Ltd hereby certify that the above is an accurate and complete record of the proceedings or part thereof