“[The mother] stated that whilst she was in a relationship with [the father] he once threw [the elder son] across the bedroom on to a mattress whilst he was angry. She stated that he had never been physically violent towards her or the children but he had bullied her through verbal taunts during their relationship. [The mother] stated that [the father] has sleep problems and this has led to him on occasions wrapping blankets around [the elder son’s] head whilst they shared a bed. She also stated that [the father] has also made unwanted sexual advances towards her whilst he has been asleep and she fears that the children would be at risk if he were to be in the sole care of the children at night time.”
“Because both parties were unrepresented, as opposed to cross-examination I allowed both parties to have their say and move the matter backwards and forwards and I heard at length from both the parties who confirmed the contents of their written documentation and gave oral evidence. I am satisfied I heard sufficient yesterday to enable me to reach some conclusions.”
“I do not doubt that mother genuinely wants what is best for her children and the views she expresses are her genuinely held views.”
“At the end of the day what this court has to grapple with is whether this father is a risk to his children.”
“…stated that he had never been physically violent towards her or the children…”
“I cannot ignore the fact that that is what it is said that mother is reporting, but other than those matters specifically referred to he had never been physically violent towards her or the children.”
“Insofar as allegations of behaviour directed against the mother are concerned, again I hear what mother says. I make no specific findings one way or the other, but these are allegations relating to the mother. Mother is not suggesting to her credit that the behaviour was such that she is living in fear of father. They are now separated. If there had been incidents, they are not going to re-occur because the parties are not together. Again, I am not satisfied that anything I have heard satisfies me that this father is a risk to his children.”
“In considering all the evidence, it is clear that a change of residence is the only way to enable the children to maintain a relationship with both parents.”
“They would also experience the significant loss of their sister… to whom they are close.”
“I know I cannot maintain a good mental state knowing that my children are in severe danger. They cannot move during contact from a violent home [viz with their father] to a distraught mother. I also have to remain stable for [my daughter]. If they were to come and stay with me I would not hand them back, and I would face imprisonment, which would not be fair for the children. I left him purely for the children and to keep them away from that violence. If I sent them to their father, it would destroy me and I could not continue as a good mother to the children. The only way I could cope would be to forget the boys and to mourn them. It also would not be fair on the children to see me distressed. I would not be able to keep a straight and happy face.”