"Over the last 40 years, I have not spoken about my past until now. I never told my family because he said if I did then he wouldn’t be able to protect me anymore and I’d have to go back to the bullies. I have had to deal with many sleepless nights, which often include nightmares of Langley which wake me up in a panicked state to which I am then unable to go back to sleep. The lack of sleep has affected my day-to-day life, I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression which I have to take medication for. Even just going to bed makes me anxious, I worry about getting stuck in the duvet bringing memories back of Langley holding me from behind. I have more recently been prescribed sleeping pills to help me sleep, another medication to take due to Langley's actions of taking advantage of me as a child. I have gone on to have 3 amazing children with my ex-wife, however, bringing them up has had its challenges. I never bathed or changed their nappies as I could not touch their intimate parts, Langley stripped me of my capability as a father to my children as memories of him would come back to me. I experience crying outbursts at times which are uncontrollable, which are brought about from the memories of Langley abusing me. These memories come to me unexpectedly which makes me a very anxious person. I have also sought comfort in food over the years resulting in obesity. When I can’t sleep I eat. Coming forward has been a frightening experience. It has taken all the courage I have because it has heightened all the terrifying feelings of fear, shame, confusion, isolation and sickening turmoil I have felt inside over the years and still feel to this day. The truth is the truth and although I cannot escape it I have at least finally found the courage to tell it!"
"[The appellant] made me the victim of his coercion. He took away the innocence of intimacy and used me for sex – a physical abuse that takes a lifetime to unravel. He shamed me for my whole life until I met my husband 31 years ago. I have been haunted by him and lived with the anxiety, turmoil and misunderstood guilt followed by shame and silence. I have never told my mother or father or my husband until 40 years later. As for the institution there was no questioning, no curiosity or observance of children, just a wall of silence. The thought of re-living those extreme experiences in my intimate relations has always been a part of my husband’s life too. Not only has this experience changed my life it has been affected the closest to me. Raymond Langley trapped me psychologically, which has never left me and I struggle with that knowledge to this day. I am happy now that at last he has been put on trial, held to account for his behaviour – whatever the outcome, my story is heard."